Monday, July 20, 2009
They meant well...
I have no idea how this post should be laid out... I myself have no idea too on what feeling I should have... It never crossed my mind that such thing will happen in the family... I always thought that everyone in the family is safe and healthy... But this is so not true... Mummy always share the joy with me but never the sorrow...
This time she ordered everyone to keep this from me just because she doesn't want to affect my mood as my finals was around the corner during that time... I was not even made known after my exam as they want me to enjoy myself here... Jie told me today and I immediately broke down in front of the laptop... I don't know how am I supposed to reply and react to the news... Why am I the last to know this time??? Why no one dares to tell me??? Why no one asked me to go back earlier???
For the first time in my life, I feel that I am such an useless daughter... I always feel that I can always make papa and mummy proud... But then, this time I classified myself as char siew... A daughter who only knows how to enjoy her life and spend money... A daughter who does not even want to come back right after exam... A daughter who decided to spend more money and laze around for 2 months before decided to go back Malaysia for good... I am such a good for nothing...
I asked jie so many whys... Why no one told me after my exam??? Why no one let me know even when I video called them??? Why why why??? Simply because mummy ordered them that no one should let me know it... Even after exam... Mek told me that mummy said I don't need to know it...
This time around, I have so many regrets... I should have go back earlier... I am so selfish... Papa and mummy love me more than I realised... They chose to keep it from me just because they want me to enjoy myself here... Mummy hid it so well from me that when I talked to her on the phone, she does not even let the cat out of the bag... Jie, Han, Mek and Wei did not mention anything to me at all when I am chatting with them in MSN...
I know they meant well... I can't help with anything... I can't fly back immediately too... I just simply hate myself this time....
Shi Hui <3
Wednesday, July 08, 2009
Sleeping Blog???
NO NO NO!!!This is definitely not a sleeping blog!!!!
I am going to update something here very very soon...
Current status : Busy emptying my room...
I am trying very very hard to stuff in everything in my suddenly-become-so-small luggage... And I am headache over having so many things... I need to do some soul-searching... Shopping queen title... Shopaholic title... Anyone??? I am trying to practice window shopping... :P:P:P
Wish me luck and see you soon... Hehe...
Shi Hui <3
